I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful, I know that full well.
Psalm 139:14

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

What are His plans?

Today would have been Mason's first birthday. It is a tough day for us, but we are at peace with knowing that he is in a much better place. The song that keeps coming to mind is "Better is One Day" by Chris Tomlin. This afternoon we were supposed to hear our second child's heartbeat. I began lightly bleeding this morning and decided to head to the clinic early. When I got there my doctor could see me right away. She tried to find a heatbeat but failed at doing so. She immediately scheduled an ultrasound for this afternoon. At my ultrasound the tech found that there was just a blob of tissue (I don't know all the medical terms for this), and no heartbeat. It turns out that I have had a misscarriage and am scheduled for a D and C early tomorrow morning. Please pray that God will guide the doctor's hands as he is working in a very sensitive part of me. I also ask for your prayers in dealing with this emotionally. Nathan and I are having a really bad day and it just seems to get worse as the hours go on. We have gone to Mason's grave and have asked him to take good care of his little sister or brother since we are unable to do so once again. We are feeling so much pain and continue to wonder what God's plans are for us.

-Crystal

10 comments:

  1. Oh Crystal, my heart goes out to you! So sorry to hear, prayers and thoughts.

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  2. I am so very sorry Crystal! Words are not enough. I will be praying for you & Nathan as you mourn two babies.

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  3. Oh Crystal, I'm so very sorry to hear this! But I hope you know that you _have_ taken very good care of both your little Mason and now this little one too. You've given them unconditional, unstinting, unwavering love, and I'm sure they've both been blessed by it.

    Dawn D.

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  4. My heart is breaking for you. Praying like mad for you and your family of 4. I'm so sorry Crystal.

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  5. When I saw your facebook comment today, I was saddened to think of what a hard day this must be for you. And now to read your post of how your day really went. I'm so sorry, girly. Some how God is going to get the glory through these struggles, even when it's hard to see the plan He has for your family. Just take each day as it comes, He gives you enough grace for everyday. Hang on to Him! And don't listen to the deceiving voice of the enemy when he tries to tell you it was because of something you did or it was your fault. Nothing could be farther from the truth. Your in my prayers, Crystal.

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  6. Crystal and Nathan, I am so very sorry you are having to deal with this, especially on a day that is already painful for you to think about. I am praying for you, for healing, for Jesus to guide the doctors hands, and for you to walk forward in faith. God has plans, but sometimes they are just so hard for us to see and understand.

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  7. Oh Crystal, I am so sorry for your loss. I can't even begin to imagine. Praying for you guys during this hard time.

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  8. Praying for you guys as you walk this road you never wanted to go down again. Praying strength and hope for you.

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  9. Praying for you as you walk this path. So sorry for your loss.

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  10. I am so saddened to hear of your loss yet again. We will keep you in our prayers.

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